Lets have a dream,
Lay by me,
We’ll go make a raft,
And float in the sea,
No thought for a tragedy,
Just bliss upon bliss,
The coconut haze,
The sand on our feet,
No snow, the sleet,
No wind nor rain,
Just time that passes,
Passes us by,
To the beat of our heart and the pace of our mind,
No train to be tracking,
No plane to be soaring,
Just sea,
Just the beach,
Just the grass within reach,
The sand,
Our grain,
Eager but not vain,
To just be ourselves,
To just once be supreme,
To be yours,
To be mine,
For eternity.

Oh please,
Let it be,
For i yearn to be free,
To sail, to surf, to glide, to fly,
To yell out the words,
I’m happy to be,
I can see,
I’m not blind,
I’m not deaf,
I’m not ill,
I live,
I’m here,
I’m now,
I’m yours,
World come and hug me,
I promise i adore you,
I’ll be yours,
You be mine,
Through the space and time,
And beyond.
Let’s be free…
For eternity.

So it’s waiting and i’m screaming now
It’s calling and I’m wanting, everything
Is shit, to be stuck,
To be lost in a rut.

We’re thinking together and breathing as one, thought
I could be with it day and night,
But I was wrong,
The man is blocking my sun.

Life injects minds with haste too quick,
The feeling subsides to choose,
What the creative sponge will suck up today,
Like a vulture in the burning winds.

The deserts of my mind,
Prickled by the distaste for human integrity.

I’m arming my guilt with a smoke grenade,
Short fuse.
Pin released.

I hope that the echo beholds a rapture,
We all sought before the aftermath.
The endless conundrum of a sharp complexity,
And a beveled personality.

I’ll gallop away on my horse,
To the mountains of beyond,
To the valleys yonder,
And envelop myself in elation.

FUCKING GRUB FUCKING LOADER… PIECE OF SHIT…

The same problem over and over again. You restart after a computer crash and GRUB WANKING LOADER COMES UP…

“Grub Loader could not initialize: ERROR 15″ or some fucking error like that…

What? WHAT? FUCKING WHAT? I already uninstalled your ass you piece of shit.

This is how to repair Windows 7 if Grub decides to take over your god damn pc again.

1. Put your windows 7 disk in the computer
2. It will load before the Grub loader if your BIOS has CD as 1st in BOOT Sequence
3. Wait for Windows 7 disk to load, choose your language and press next
4. Select Repair your computer (bottom left)
5. Click Command Prompt
6. Type: dir
7. Is this your windows partition? If not, find the windows partition, it’ll have windows folder in it I’m guessing. You can change drive by typing: c: or whatever drive letter you have then typing: dir to check.
8. When you’ve found it, type: “chkdsk /f drive:” without the quotes. Replace “drive:” with whatever drive your windows installation is installed on.
9. It’ll do some long old process of checking files and will tell you when it has done its job.
10. After it’s done, press the close button and restart your computer, take the disk out and cross your fucking fingers
11. If this hasn’t solved your problem, pray to fucking God, because it took me 1 whole hour to find a forum with an answer that worked and this ain’t the first time it has happened.

UP YOURS GRUB LOADER

I always forget it, how do you work out a percentage… So here you are, this is how you work out a percentage:

(Given amount/ Total amount) * 100

example:

My website has had 1,522 unique visitors.

There are 6,697,254,041 people in the whole world

(1522/6697254041) * 100

*cries*… I’m not divulging in the percentage of the world that visits my site, because it will drive me into a deep depression…

But there you have it: How to work out a percentage.

As another sun is drowned by the horison,
I think to myself – what have I achieved;
Bowing my head in shame,
I follow the path of Helios,
And hold my breath.

Ok… Gran Turismo 5 Uk release date delayed again. No problems *bites nails*… Delaying the game until Christmas is ok with me *rips child’s head off*… I’ve not been affected in the slightest *vomits on floor and cries like a baby girl*.

There we have it…

Gran Turismo 5 will now be released in UK “before Christmas”…

This is what they say:

“We are sorry to say that Gran Turismo 5 will not be available on the previously announced release date of November 3rd, but the game will be released before Christmas,” a statement read.

“We sincerely apologise to GT fans for the delay, however creator Kazunori Yamauchi and the team at Polyphony Digital want to make certain they are creating a racing experience of the highest quality.

“We are confident that this ambitious game will exceed expectations when it launches later this year. We’ll have more information for you in the near future.”

That’s all folks!

James

Google Chrome RSS Feed not working? That’s right!

Try and click on my RSS Feed button at the top of the page using Google Chrome and all hell will break loose.

Reason: Google Chrome does not ship with an RSS Feed browser so you’ll have to go look for an extension.

Luckily I found one for you and it seems to work fine:

https://chrome.google.com/extensions/detail/nlbjncdgjeocebhnmkbbbdekmmmcbfjd

I am astonished at it not having an RSS browser by default, it seems like a pretty standard feature these days?

Crazy.

I wouldn’t normally blog about such a thing but I was a little pissed off at the simple yet ridicously stupid comment left by a Valve member on Steam forums.

I found an issue with the Steam user interface on the News Page and decided to report it with a friendly suggestion:

Javascript problem on the Steams UI News Page.

When you scroll to the bottom, it uses Ajax to call the latest news articles, appends them to the bottom of the table and extends the scrollbar. Unfortunately because of this, when you want to use the menu items at the bottom of the page, you can never do so, because the page consistently appends old news on to the bottom. It reminds me of a Mac, try to select something at the bottom and the dock comes up, you can never get to it. lol.

Can we not have some archive feature instead of this? Ajax is great but it introduces some problems I once made this schoolboy error, lovely to see many others make it too… phew.

You could have a button on the News page at the bottom that calls the “LoadMoreNews()” function within the news.js instead? Should do the trick? Perhaps put a counter on there like “show next 10 news articles”, but it’ll have to be dynamic; if the user comes to the last set of news articles, it’ll need to say for example “show next 3 articles”. No doubt you got some object methods/paramaters lurking around with that info.

All the best and good luck!

Ok, so that’s fair enough right? I awaited a response and this is what I got:

It’s intended how it is now. The footer is only included so that news pages that filter to only a few stories don’t end abruptly. If you are viewing all news then you will indeed be scrolling for a long time before reaching it, but it’s not a primary navigation element and is considered less useful than seeing more news.

Well, great feature jmccaskey, I’m really happy to see that Valve’s team are well rehearsed in defending their coding… Boo.

Anyway, just a rant of the day kind of thing. Hope they fix it.

Support me by posting in the Steam Forum here.

A little birdie told me that the New Zealand Hobbit set for Peter Jackson’s Prequel to the Lord of the Rings has been burnt down.

There seems to be a little uncertainty as to how the fire started but there is reason to believe that it may have been the Actors Union; Peter Jackon, New Line, Warner Bros and MGMs have had some conflict in the pay that actors get.

Don’t be too worried though, the production of the movie is still happening and filming will be started in 2011 (subject to further delays).

Here’s some source:

• http://celebrifi.com/gossip/Hobbit-set-burns-down-in-New-Zealand-3613413.html
• http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/showbiz/news/a280033/hobbit-set-burns-down-in-new-zealand.html?rss

I’m pretty damn excited about The Hobbit being made into a movie, I was just recently talking to a friend about how I miss such movies. Yippee…

Why bash your banana round whilst carrying it in your hand when you can buy a banana guard.

Only the best for your banana!

Buy it for your girlfriend at Christmas, watch her grab your banana and load it into the banana guard, she won’t be bashing that for a while! eh-oh…

Amongst the stack of reading materials in Tesco, I managed to find an amusing collection of comics and children books. This one specifically made my belly explode with chuckle power.

They call it – “Grandpa in my pocket” – Notice the fact that it’s a “special magazine”.

I… I just can’t breathe… Oh please, help, stop me laughing. I just can’t help but think of the old man in Family Guy – ” ‘Sssscuse me Ssssssonnyy “.

I can’t believe they gave this children’s magazine such a sworded name.

Look at the positioning of that poor boy… He sure does look surprised to find that Grandpas “cap” is shrinking.

After coming back from holiday, I turned my computer on only to find this staring back at me – “Zone Alarm ZeuS.Zbot.aoaq Virus Alert”.

Naturally I googled it straight away to see what the fuss was all about and found out to my horror that Zone Alarm was now producing Scare Ware.

Here is the original article which i’m sure you’ll be interested in reading…

My verdict is that Zone alarm has been very good to me since installing it about 4 years ago… Why start this shit now.

Anyway, just ignore the message by clicking the X in the corner. Should do the job nicely. Obviously go and look for another firewall/virus checker that does offer the protection you need for free if you are worried; I will be doing just that.

I was on holiday in Gran Canaria for a week… I get one text during that whole time and it said “Interesting news, Coffee machine blew up”…

I mean, it’s kinda funny when your swimming in a pool in 37 degrees heat drinking cocktail after cocktail after beer after whatever that drink is after more and more alcohol… but damn is that freaking crazy. That poor women who got absolutely pwned, hope she does allright etc…

Want a coffee?… KABOOM!

Ok so here’s a quote from a proper long news article about what happened… Probably should click through and read up on this crazy shit.

Mail Online: “It went off like a bomb yesterday in Sainsbury’s, in Farnborough, Hampshire, blasting a hole in a wall and injuring 15 people.”

Enjoy your cup of coffee…

I was listening to Radio 1 today and there was some commotion about Rihannas new song release – Only Girl. I’ve got to be honest, it was very boring to listen to. I’m terribly glad that she changed the pitch of her voice nearing the end of the song because that high pitch stretch she does was grinding my gears.

I also wanted to ask why all songs including “Rihanna – Only Girl” sound so similar. They all have the same synth ideas going on and the same beat structures throughout, it’s tedious, especially listening to Radio 1 that constantly plays this stuff. I’m not saying it’s shit and I’m really glad that people enjoy listening but… That song was very boring… Is that my opinion? I don’t know anymore, I’m starting to think it’s a fact. From a huge celebrity musical talent such as Rihanna, you expect a bit more effort put in.

Unfortunately I can’t find a video for the song yet, but when I do, I’ll put it here.

And here’s a link to the lyrics so you can be amused: http://www.directlyrics.com/rihanna-only-girl-lyrics.html

And here is a little talk about on the new song: http://www.aceshowbiz.com/news/view/00035185.html

*shrugs shoulders*.

Now don’t get me wrong, I love my Mazda 6 TS Estate 2.0 but after taking a drive in the Vauxhall Astra VXR (with more poke than a snooker cue) I’m finding it hard to feel settled in it. So it’s time for a new car.

It’s hard to move away from Mazda once you’ve had a Mazda. The 6 series gives the most fantastic drive and even for an estate, the car is pretty fun. It’s got a bit of edge that I really admire. So I thought I’d stick with Mazda, at least this time round.

I’ve been reading up a lot about various different cars and judging how much money I had to spend on my latest fix and came to the conclusion that the Mazda 6 MPS was the best way to go.

I did a search on autotrader.co.uk and found about 8 Mazda 6 MPS on sale, 3 of which were worth looking at. After sending a few emails off, I managed to book a test drive in Ashford, Kent (about a 2 hour drive from where I live) for the following Saturday. Friday approached. I was on edge the whole evening just bursting at the seams with excitement, I knew I was going to be buying it. I Randomly went to check my emails only to find that the car had been sold and would be out of the garage on Saturday… Bugger.

Since that day, all of the Mazda 6 MPS of worth are gone. I’m struggling to pick one up in black and with a Mazda warranty attached.

So there you have it, Mazda 6 MPS is a bloody hard car to get your hands on but when I do possess its power, I will reign hell upon the earth.

Enjoy the rest of the week.

I recently pushed out the boat and decided to go on a holiday. Using Thomas Cook’s crock of shit website, I managed to get to the “pay now” button.

What’s this? Payment declined?

Apparently Abbey don’t like their customers spending over £1000 at any one time so they lock the account… I’m a thief!

Ok fair enough, a little protection on my debit card is probably a good thing, so I decided to ring up Santander, get the card unlocked and proceed with my holiday payment. No big deal!

I dialed the phone number and was greeted by the most amazingly fucking annoying music I have ever heard, like some epic adventure of banking grief. This women is telling me every 30 seconds “we’re very sorry to keep you waiting but we aren’t working hard enough to answer your call because we suck more than a Dyson”.

25 fucking minutes later I cancel the call and re-dial; more enraged than a pot of Naga Chilli.

“The custom service is currently closed, please select from the following options”

Ok, so the custom service counter is closed yet I can choose from options and wait in an infinite loop for noone to fucking answer.

*claps hands*.

Cheers Santander. Thanks for the great holiday you piece of shit.

Hi all,

If you were interested in my “Diabetics have to queue in Chessington” post, then please join the crazy discussions that are going on at diabetes.co.uk

Please share your opinion on the subject as it’s bugging me to death!

My comments are submitted as “jimmyt1988″ so please share your views here… or there!

Really hope you enjoy your day.

James Trusler

I’ve just gone through the process of adding posts from my wordpress site into Facebook and Twitter and after trying various amounts of shitty plugins I found these two beauties:

• FT FacePress II
• Post To Twitter

They are great and the Twitter plugin pretty much works straight off. It allows your posts, when published/updated, to automatically be added into Twitter. Unfortunately, FT FacePress II was not such a chalmer.

The problem was that One.com limit PHP mailer emails to 20 per day, and so I was cursing and blinding for about an hour before realising why the plugin did not work. So here’s the work around:

1. Create an email address with your host and call it something like out@domain.com
2. Download the Plugin: FT FacePress II
3. Edit the plugin and replace the following code:

if (!function_exists("ft_publish_status")) {
 function ft_publish_status($emailAddr, $status) { 

 $message = '-';
 $headers = 'From: '. get_bloginfo('admin_email') . "\r\n" .
 'Reply-To: '. get_bloginfo('admin_email') . "\r\n" .
 'X-Mailer: PHP/' . phpversion();
 wp_mail($emailAddr, $status, $message, $headers);

 if (is_wp_error($result)) {
 return $result->get_error_message();
 } else if (isset($result["response"]["code"])) {
 return $result["response"]["code"];
 } else {
 return false;    }
 }
}

with:

if (!function_exists("ft_publish_status")) {
 function ft_publish_status($emailAddr, $status) { 

 $message = '-';
 $headers = 'From: out@yourdomain.com' . "\r\n" .
 'Reply-To: '. get_bloginfo('admin_email') . "\r\n" .
 'X-Mailer: PHP/' . phpversion();
 wp_mail($emailAddr, $status, $message, $headers);

 if (is_wp_error($result)) {
 return $result->get_error_message();
 } else if (isset($result["response"]["code"])) {
 return $result["response"]["code"];
 } else {
 return false;    }
 }
}

And there we have it. You can now send as many freaking status updates as your host allows.

Enjoy success

Do they attack as I climb into their world and spread the word?

Do they fear the world they enter as I pull them in?

Hi all,

Here’s some news that will get your blood boiling and your sugar levels low.

I decided to go to Chessington World of Adventures to have a ruddy good time and as usual, I went directly to the medical hut to sort out my disability bands for my diabetes; they allow me to go to the front of queues due to the risk of getting low blood sugars whilst waiting.

I was greeted by a disabled man (not sure what he had) and I explained my situation of being diabetic, handed him a note from the doctor clearly stating that it is a risk for me to wait in the queues and listened intently to what he had to say:

CWA Staff: “Is that the only disability you have?”

ME: “erm, yes, it IS the disability I have”

CWA Staff: “Well we only hand out the bands to people who find it difficult to wait in queues”

I was stunned. I simply said ok and left the hut. The story doesn’t get much better than this. Luckily I went back in with some guts and explained:

ME: “How is this acceptable? I pay £36 to enter Chessington to have a good time, not to constantly worry about my blood sugars. When I wait in a queue, my blood sugar levels lower; especially in the sun. I get to the ride and ignore my symptoms because I am excited about getting on and then have a hypo whilst on it.”

CWA Staff: “Well we will give you the band this time, but next time you need to bring a letter stating it’s difficult for you to wait in a queue”

Well hangon… Didn’t I just tell you it’s difficult you fool, and read the damn letter too, it explains it.

So anyway, I got the band but what a total waste of my time.

I guess what I want to try and say is that Chessington World of Adventurers is way off the mark when it comes to defining what a disability is.

Grr, James

Hi all,

Have you ever got up in the morning, pushed your finger through the orange carton film at the top only to find you just pushed the pouring mechanism into the carton. No? Well…

Have you ever got up in the morning, successfully opened up the shitty carton and maintained its functionality, only to find that it pours out like the first piss in the morning. I mean for goodness sake, does gravity not apply to these cartons. You might as well just pour the fucking orange juice onto the table to save you the time.

Grrr. Orange juice cartons really grind my gears.

What a frustrating 5 months. I had made a website called www.thinkingproducitivty.co.uk about 5 months ago thinking that Google will be lapping up the content like a cat who has no concept of being full, alas, I was wrong.

After 5 months of no Google indexing, I realised there was a problem. It took all my courage to a post on the Wordpress site with such an embarassing issue.

I got some great responses and I truly thank the users for helping me out:

One of them suggested it might be a server issue. I contacted one.com to see if there was any problems with the servers that might be blocking Google index from my Wordpress website. The customer service guy “Eduard” responded within about 10 seconds with “check your .htaccess file”…

# -FrontPage-

IndexIgnore .htaccess */.??* *~ *# */HEADER* */README* */_vti*

order deny,allow
deny from all
allow from all

order deny,allow
deny from all

# BEGIN WordPress

RewriteEngine On
RewriteBase /
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-f
RewriteCond %{REQUEST_FILENAME} !-d
RewriteRule . /index.php [L]

# END WordPress

*FACEPALM*

I simply removed the lines above

# BEGIN WordPress

And literally facepalmed myself, not palmed... That would be very weird? no?.

Enjoy the rest of your day!